Live Authentically

Sunday, April 14, 2013 - 9:00 PM - Day 22 of new blog

I find that it is dangerous to over-analyze why we get angry, depressed or anxious. Sometimes we just feel these emotions because of old stress working its way out. And sometimes because we are getting a cold.

I have a cold:(

I will just experience what is and move forward.

It's very important to live authentically to have a fulfilling life.

Have a good night,

Marilyn

My New Diet

Saturday, April 13, 2013 - 10:00 PM - Day 21 of new blog

They say if you do something consistently for 21 days in a row it will become part of your daily routine  effortlessly. I would say this is true for writing this blog:)))

So, I've been contemplating what to do about dropping some weight.
I decided today to try alternate day fasting.
I've tried different methods to lose weight in the past but none of them seem right for me at this time in my life.
Alternate day fasting seems to make a lot of sense!
The "fast day" you keep your calories no more than 400, but how you do that is up to you. I like that:)  I can do juicing on some days, soup on others. I can eat a light raw food diet on fast days or just eat fruits and nuts. This gives the digestive system plenty of time to clear out the food from the day before. Then, if deprivation sets in, I always have the next day to eat normal meals. I'll keep you posted on how it goes in this blog.

I also started taking green coffee bean extract. This too sounds helpful. There is lots on the internet about it if you want to learn more.

We'll see after 21 days if this becomes a natural part of my routine.

Hope you all are enjoying your weekend,

Marilyn

Prioritizing Rest

Friday, April 12, 2013 - 6:30 PM - Day 20 of new blog

April is Stress Awareness Month.

TGIF Tip - If it's Friday afternoon and you feel fatigued, drained, tired of thinking, irritable, spent and ready for mindless entertainment, you overdid it this week.

GUILTY!

I am ready for my glass of wine (or two ...), treats and a video.

So, I ask myself how can I prevent this next week?

Answer:
Prioritize rest over accomplishment.

I know this is not a popular solution, but it is a real solution.
And, as a physician once told my husband when he was in the ED several years ago:
"Your health is more important than anything."

Cheers!

Marilyn

Making People Feel More Comfortable

Thursday, April 11, 2013 - 7:30 PM - Day 19 of new blog

I took notice of something today that occurs quite regularly in most people's lives.

I was at the dentist getting my teeth cleaned. As the dental hygienist was getting started she asked "So What's New?"

Now ... I only see this person twice a year and when you get your teeth cleaned you are not chatting about your life - you can't! I have no recollection of my conversation with her six months ago.

I'm not sharing this as a complaint about the dental hygienist, by the way. She was just being friendly.
I'm sharing it because I learned something.

Here's what I learned:

I noticed I felt uncomfortable because I had no idea how to respond. Do I say something funny? Do I think of something interesting to share? Do I state a neutral response? Do I shrug my shoulders?

Then I thought about my role when greeting my clients, my patients or my customers. I've actually said "So What's New?" to some of them and they may have felt unsure of how to respond too. I can't be the only one!

So ... what's the solution?

The public speaking courses I've taken used to teach that specific questions are much easier for people to answer than generalized questions.
So instead of saying "What's New?" a person could say "How was your day today?" "Have any vacation plans this summer?" "What's the weather like outside?"
These are much easier to answer.

I try not to make anyone feel uncomfortable as I go about my day. This brief interaction at the dentist helped me fine tune my communication even more. And, my teeth are cleaned;)

See ya tomorrow,
Marilyn

The Awareness Technique

Wednesday, April 10, 2013 - 10:00 PM - Day 18 of new blog

My mind was very peaceful today. I experienced inner silence frequently throughout the day.

In the evening I continued writing new artcles for our Living Stress Free website because it is Stress Awareness Month. Focusing on the signs, symptoms and facts about "stress" started affecting my mind.
I noticed I felt more tension, mental constriction and fatigue. Describing stress in great detail started causing me stress!

Moral of the story: Be careful what you focus on, especially when exclusively focusing on it.

The antidote?

The Awareness Technique:

Feel the air at the level of your nose as you breath.
While doing this, notice how your body feels.
While doing both of these, listen to the sounds in your environment.
Finally, be aware of your thoughts while noticing the other three.

With this technique you are including everything you are experiencing instead of excluding parts of your total experience. It diffuses stress and cultivates a calm, groundedness.

Peace ...


Marilyn

Ways to Diminish Desire

Tuesday, April 9, 2013 - 10:30 PM - Day 17 of new blog

It's interesting to observe the difference between how I feel when I'm reacting to my life and how I feel when I'm calmly responding to it.

Lately I've been calmly responding to it:)))

Why?

I'm experiencing inner silence every day in my meditation practice and I'm more attentive to "flowing through the day" because of this blog! 

I write suggestions and tips each day which reinforces my own practice of them.

One of my recent realizations is about desire. 

When I'm feeling my worst - miserable, depressed, disheartened - it's usually because of one common theme. I'm desiring something I wish I had, a circumstance I wish would happen, a dream I feel I deserve and resent the fact it's not mine.

All of this is based on desire. 

The yogic scriptures describe desire as "poison", and I can see why. It does no good and leads us astray. It is destructive and interferes with inner peace, calmness and surrender. It fools us over and over again.

However, human beings are defined by their desires. It's part of our natural experience on this earth.

My solution?

"Keep your feet on the ground and your eye on the prize".

Focus on the task at hand. Fully experience what you are doing; then do the next task.

Stay fully present, experience the NOW as often and as consistently as possible.

Someone told me recently, go through the day on autopilot. Don't think about what you are doing - just do it.

This is the antidote to desire.

Have a peaceful night,

Marilyn

Just Do the Next Thing

Monday, April 8, 2013 - 8:30 PM - Day 16 of new blog

I was helping one of my patients in a therapy session today who is struggling with reconciling opposites - her old unhealthy identity vs her new healthy identity. She asked what the easiest way to reconcile this would be.

This is what I told her:
Acknowledge and honor both sides of yourself but don't do anything about it.
Instead, just do the next thing.
Fully experience what you are doing and then do the next thing.  Fully experience what you are doing and then do the next thing. Fully experience what you are doing and then do the next thing...

This is true for my life and probably everybody's life!

All we can really do is "just do the next thing".
It's that simple.

This suggestion immediately diffuses the relentless thinking mind. That very mind is what causes our dissatisfaction, frustration and endless unfulfilled desires.

Let's all do the next thing and have a peaceful sleep.

Good night.

Marilyn