What to do if you are sick and tired of something

Thursday, May 30, 2013 - 9:30 PM - Life Coaching Blog


If you are sick and tired of something in your life that needs to change here is an important truism to be aware of:

Anything you have an aversion to is bringing you out of the "now". The secret to happiness, contentment and success is embracing the now. You accept the is-ness of the moment -  the circumstance, the present reality. Do not resist it.
Full acceptance leads to change. Change starts to come naturally when resistance is dropped.

Example:

I don't want to go to work one day; I focus on all the frustrations of my job, wishing I could be working independently; I don't know why my business won't take off ... this is aversion, this is resistance.

This type of thinking will perpetuate the current circumstance.

The more I embrace my job, the faster the karma will be exhausted and my new opportunities will thrive.

Namaste,
Marilyn

How to Experience Life

Tuesday, May 28, 2013 - 7:30 PM - Life Coaching Blog

I have realized after much contemplation, meditation, and life experiences, this is true:

The more you let go of your ideas about life, the more you will enjoy the experience of living

MG

Enjoy your evening,
Marilyn

Five Tips to help you Recreate!

Monday, May 27, 2013 - 9:00 PM - Life Coaching Blog

Hope you enjoyed your Sunday, yesterday:)) I took a day off from blogging. I was recreating ...

Let's talk RECREATION!


Here are Five Tips to prioritize Recreation:

1.  Most people who work hard do not have time for much recreation in their life. Part of this is understandable and part of this is an excuse because it is not prioritized. The only way to "re-create" the ability of the mind and body to function well is to "recreate". It's time to make the time.

2.  When people make the time for recreation, many feel guilty because they think about all the things they still have to do. This is the most challenging hurdle to honoring this part of life. If we stay in the moment and enjoy the activity we will not fall into the trap of guilt.

3.  Many people don't fully understand what recreation is. It is something you don't have to do, that you choose to do, because it is enjoyable. That's it. This includes sports, games, hobbies, artistic endeavors, crafts, creating new things, spending time doing things with others, scenic drives, etc. It does not mean sleeping! lol. It requires action.

4.  Some people have spent so many years busy with their work, their challenges and their difficulties that they don't know what to do to recreate. The best way to remedy this is to go back in time and remember something that was enjoyable in the past and revive this activity. Or, notice if a newspaper article, a commercial, a magazine photo, a story from a coworker, etc., peaks interest. Maybe it's something YOU can try?

5.  Imagine yourself having fun. What is it that you are doing? Intentionally bring this into your life.


Memorial Day Weekend in the US is the unofficial beginning of summer; and summer = recreation.

I struggle with #2 the most and then #1. The other three I've got covered;)
How about you?

Wishing you well,
Marilyn

Being the best YOU that you can be!

Saturday, May 25, 2013 - 7:30 PM - Life Coaching Blog


Don't resist any of your natural tendencies.

This is a common theme in Taoist, Buddhist and Yogic traditions. I am experiencing it to be true in my life on a daily basis. I can also see it's true with the people I work with.
The more you stop "doing" constantly, and spend time "being" the more you gain wisdom into how life REALLY works.

What is one of the truisms of life?

Resistance causes a multitude of problems.

Do not resist who you authentically are. And do not judge it. You are the way you are for a reason. Be the best YOU that you can be.

It's all about surrendering to what is.

In this surrender and allowing yourself to be who you are, change will naturally occur if it needs to. Trust the wisdom of nature - it's on your side;)


Warm regards,
Marilyn

Be Aware of Awareness

Thursday, May 23, 2013 - 9:30 PM - Life Coaching Blog

I've been teaching a Mindfulness Class at the University of Rochester, working with students who have the same frustration - "I can't stop my thoughts".

I would imagine this is a common problem for many people.

The secret is to not try and stop your thoughts. There is a fundamental difference between thoughts and thinking. Mindfulness practice works with the "thinking" not the thoughts.

The best way to let go of the frustration about thoughts is to just let them be and become identified with the awareness of the thoughts. Become aware of awareness itself. That is the true secret to mindfulness practice.

I invite you to read my latest article on my website:

Mindfulness Explained

Have a lovely evening,
Marilyn

Dissolving Resentment

Wednesday, May 22, 2013 - 8:30 PM - Life Coaching Blog


I was having a discussion about "financial woes" with friends recently. The discussion was helpful in that we needed to "vent" about how expensive routine necessities have become, but the discussion inevitably shifted to comparing our situation to others who may not have to pay the same amount for the same things. This resulted in a bit of resentment and "us-and-them" thinking.

I pondered this natural, human reaction. Society seems to be based on comparison which breeds judgmental attitudes. Resentment and frustration leads to stress, which results in dissatisfaction and a lack of effectiveness. My pondering led to a solution ...

Read full article here

This is a sample of my weekly tips for LSF Life Coaching.
If you are interested in receiving these free weekly emails, visit my website and sign up on the left column - "Areas of Interest"

Click here for website 

Have a great night!
Marilyn

The Is-Ness of Everything

Tuesday, May 21, 2013 - 9:30 PM - Life Coaching Blog


“In this moment, there is plenty of time.
In this moment, you are precisely as you should be.
In this moment, there is infinite possibility. ”
― Victoria Moran, Younger by the Day: 365 Ways to Rejuvenate Your Body and Revitalize Your Spirit

It's all perfect in its imperfection.

Cheers to the "is-ness" of everything.

Warm regards,

Marilyn

Rest = Success

Monday, May 20, 2013 - 8:15 PM - Life Coaching Blog

I want to remind everyone of an essential aspect of life that is not usually prioritized:

REST


Rest, the most underrated and significant factor to staying young, vibrant and beautiful.

Rest, the easiest and most effective way to counteract stress.

Rest, the obvious opposite of how most of us spend our days, and the perfect tool to balance our life.

Prioritize rest. Take rest breaks when possible, but at least three times per day. If you have to, use a timer! When the alarm goes off, make yourself rest. I had to do that, and it works.

Rest = Success

Hope you're loving life,
Marilyn

Want to make God laugh?

Sunday, May 19, 2013 - 9:15 PM - Life Coaching Blog

Well, I was able to go 54 days straight with uninterrupted blog postings until Friday night. Exhaustion set in and all my usual routines had to be set aside. This continued through Saturday.

I practiced a "golden rule" that I teach anyone I coach - even if you make a solid commitment to do something every day, you must allow for the inevitable changes in routine that can and will occur.

Remember that old saying: "Want to make God laugh? Tell him/her your plans ..."

So NEVER feel bad, guilty, disappointed, frustrated, upset, hopeless, apathetic or nervous if you disrupt your consistency. Guess what? You are human.

I took some time to focus on other areas of life besides contribution and LSF! And my balance returned:)

Here is a helpful article I forgot I had on my website!

Ten Reminders to Reduce your Stress Right Now

Enjoy!

Catch you tomorrow,
Marilyn

Flexibility

Thursday, May 16, 2013 - 10:15 PM - Day 54 of Life Coaching Blog

Another lesson in flexibility today. I decided to take a break from my focus on the website tonight, and go to our local spring festival - the Lilac Festival - to see a free concert of Rusted Root, one of my favorite bands. I had to work a full day and didn't leave for the concert until 6:00 PM (it started at 7:00)

Well, it took 1 1/2 hours to get close to the park due to traffic, and then there was no parking at all!
We could have kept looking for a place to park, but would have missed the concert.

We ended up at a wonderful French-style restaurant called The Cure. We had a lovely light meal and made the best of the evening.

I guess you never know for sure what you are supposed to do on any given day or night.

Namaste,
Marilyn

A Few Words about Relationships

Wednesday, May 15, 2013 - 10:15 PM - Day 53 of Life Coaching Blog

Thinking about relationships today...
An ever-changing aspect of life that is incredibly fulfilling at the same time.


Helpful Tips for Improving Relationships:

1. Pretend that every being you come across throughout your day was sent to you for a helpful reason. What reason? To learn, to grow and to progress in our life. Be open to the fact that others can improve your existence if you are aware of what they are offering you - positive or negative. This will prevent aversion to others and help improve all relationships in your life.

2. When you find yourself thinking about those in your life who you are experiencing dissonance with, or are unable to see anymore, shift your attention to the NOW. Focus your attention on those who come into your space in the present. Honor everyone who you come in contact with in present reality. The other relationships are only in your mind at this moment, and they are draining your energy.

3. Use positive visualization and the law of attraction: If all relationships in your life were positive, fulfilling and enriching, what would that look like? How would you communicate with your spouse or significant other?  How would you relate to your family? Imagine yourself contacting and connecting with your friends. Picture positive interactions with professionals who assist you such as doctors, accountants, lawyers or teachers. How would you act toward your coworkers? How about neighbors, acquaintances, fellow church members or other students in your class? Picture these interactions being fulfilling and enriching. Also, don’t forget strangers - how would you act toward people you do not know? Lastly, imagine your non-human relationships with pets, wildlife and nature. How do you imagine honoring them? Each day imagine all your relationships being perfect for that day.

Sleep well,
Marilyn

My Life Coaching Style

Tuesday, May 14, 2013 - 10:00 PM - Day 52 of Life Coaching Blog

I am so focused on my Living Stress Free® duties I can barely get to anything else. It's funny how that happens. I'm riding the wave of the spring energy. Can you feel it.

At the risk of being self indulgent, humor me in viewing my updated description of Life Coaching, LSF style ...


"Living Stress Free® Life Coaching helps you achieve happiness, health and success in your life by living spherically - in many directions, honoring all parts of our life, in a balanced way. LSF Life Coaching is unique in that it teaches you how to cultivate internal changes that spontaneously lead to external results. The coaching is a "no stress, no strain" approach. Methods include mentoring, psychological counseling, cognitive behavioral therapy, time management and conflict resolution, using the principles and techniques of Living Stress Free® tailored to your individual needs.

Living Stress Free® Life Coaching is not therapy. It's something more!

The focus is on the "now" not on the past. You will learn how to "love the now", as we say in LSF."

CLICK HERE FOR MORE INFO


Have a pleasant night,
Marilyn

Prioritize your Priorities

Monday, May 13, 2013 - 10:30 PM - Day 51 of Life Coaching Blog

As I've mentioned before, it's not easy working full time, managing a household with 5 pets, spending time with my husband/soulmate, taking care of myself and trying to help my business thrive.

Tonight I had to redo the shopping cart on my website. I created new product lists. It reads much easier now! Feels good.

Here's the link to my website if you'd like to see what I've updated under "products".

My suggestion for tonight is this. If you have a priority that must be completed - just do it.

Cheers!
Marilyn

Mother's Day Greetings

Sunday, May 12, 2013 - 8:30 PM - Day 50 of Life Coaching Blog

Wishing all the Moms a very Happy Mother's Day!


"A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie."  ~Tenneva Jordan

I'm sending all the Moms reading this as much pie as you want!

LSF tip for today:

After you make sure others are happy, do a little something special to make YOU happy.

Best wishes for a stress free holiday. Celebrate as long as you can!

Marilyn

Update on Goal to Lose Weight

Saturday, May 11, 2013 - 9:15 PM - Day 49 of Life Coaching Blog

I want to share how my alternate-day-fasting is going.

I am getting used to knowing what foods are good to eat to stay in the 400 calorie range on fasting days. I basically have a soy protein shake for breakfast, raw vegetables and broth for lunch and something light for dinner such as a small piece of smoked salmon, or a couple spoonfuls of ricotta cheese and berries, for example.

However, I am not doing this every other day. I'm doing this about 3x per week. Weekends are not easy to fast! My husband and I go to the public market for farm fresh produce, meats, cheeses, etc and prepare gourmet meals based on what we buy at the farmer's market. It's a lot of fun and our "family tradition" so I am not going to spoil it by fasting. I am still making progress with my goal to lose 10-15 pounds.

Besides the fasting, I'm using green coffee bean extract and exercising.

My advice to anyone working on losing weight: do it within reason. Do not put a burden on family traditions. Find your way given your lifestyle.

Peace,
Marilyn

Finding Peace Despite Your Thoughts

Friday, May 10, 2013 - 7:00 PM - Day 48 of Life Coaching Blog


Someone recently wrote "I am powerless over my thoughts. They just happen, like breathing."

I explained "there is a place beyond thought within everyone. Go there instead of staying in the boxing ring"

It's really true. We battle with our relentless thoughts like two boxers in a ring. This can be exhausting.

As Einstein once said, you can't solve a problem on the level of the problem. So, we cannot find a solution to our powerlessness over thoughts on the level of our thinking mind. We must go deeper.

To arrive at the place beyond thought there are many techniques.
I'd like to share my favorite one.
This technique comes from the Vijnana Bhairava, an ancient yogic text from India.


AWARENESS OF THE SPACE BETWEEN THE BREATH

Sit comfortably. Close your eyes. Relax your body.

Breathe naturally, with ease. Do not force your breathing.

Begin to notice the breath as it goes in and out of your nose.
After a few breaths, notice the pause that occurs after you exhale, before you inhale. There is a moment of rest; a space.

Then, notice the pause that occurs after you inhale before you exhale. Once again there is a space.

If you cannot notice the rests and pauses, just notice the "turn-around" of your breath. Eventually the pause will happen.

This space between the breath is the gateway to the inner stillness beyond the mind; beyond thinking.

Sit for 10-20 minutes a day noticing this space between the breath.
Each breath you take is a new opportunity to find this space.
If thoughts arise while you practice this technique allow them to be there but keep focusing on the space between the breath, In time the thoughts will not distract you.

Let me know how this works for you!

Warm regards,
Marilyn

Buddha Quote

Thursday, May 9, 2013 - 11:00 PM - Day 47 of Life Coaching Blog


"The master of the art of living makes little distinction between his work and his play, his labor and his leisure, his mind and his body, his education and his recreation, his love and his religion. He hardly knows which is which; he simply pursues his vision of excellence in whatever he does, leaving others to decide whether he is working or playing. To him he is always doing both."
Buddha

Marilyn

Go to the Park for Exercising

Wednesday, May 8, 2013 - 8:30 PM - Day 46 of Life Coaching Blog

Exercise tip: Instead of walking/jogging around your neighborhood or running a track, why not exercise at your local park? The scenery is more picturesque, it is quieter, and you feel like you are on a mini vacation!

Now that the weather is warmer, I only go to the gym on rainy days. If the weather is good I have 5 different parks I take turns going to. It only takes a few minutes to drive to the park, but the exercise experience is definitely enhanced.

Here's a photo of my walk at Durand-Eastman Park in Rochester/Irondequoit yesterday.

Wishing you good health and abundant happiness,
Marilyn

How I Honored the 8 Essential Areas of Life Today

Tuesday, May 7, 2013 - 9:30 PM - Day 45 of Life Coaching Blog

Perfectly balanced day!

Here is why:

I took the day off and spontaneously honored all 8 areas of my life.

Here are the 8 Areas as we present them in Living Stress Free®

Mental Health - Had a day off, meditated, took a break from my job duties

Physical Health - Walked 3 miles, ate healthy food, pampered myself

Prosperity - Planned budget, deposited money in different banks, kept on top of $

Education - Learned new things by exploring the internet, learned new things talking to a client on the phone

Spirituality - Meditation, prayer, communing with nature

Recreation - Walked along Lake Ontario, prepared a special dinner, watched a movie, listened to music

Contribution - Did some cleaning in the house, worked on marketing the business

Relationships - reconnected with an old client, kept in touch with husband all day, took care of pets


I wanted to share how I used the "8 Areas" as an example of what YOU can do!

Be well, be happy,

Marilyn

The Obsessed Mind and Externalization

Monday, May 6, 2013 - 10:00 PM - Day 44 of Life Coaching Blog

I was working with a client today and we discovered a couple interesting tendencies the mind falls into if unchecked.

The first is about getting obsessed. If there is a pattern in your life to become overly focused on a person, a thing, an activity, to the extent you become fixated or dependent, it is usually a sign you are distracting yourself from something else that is a bigger stressor. Acknowledge and confront the big issue and the obsessive tendency has a chance to dissolve.

The second mental tendency is the need to look for external comfort and support instead of focusing internally. We all have the ability to nurture and support ourselves with healthy habits, calming techniques and feelings of accomplishment. If you find yourself exclusively searching for the approval or acknowledgement of others instead of focusing on yourself, you will experience pain and disappointment. Look within and help yourself feel fulfillment.

I like to share themes that may be of help to others in my work with clients.
Hope you find this useful.

Marilyn

Harnessing that Spring Energy!

Sunday, May 5, 2013 - 10:30 PM - Day 43 of Life Coaching Blog

Spring energy can really help motivate people. Can you feel it?
I have felt more inspired, more energized, more active this past month than I did since last October!

It's been great to exercise, wake up earlier, make longer to-do lists ...

However, beware of getting overwhelmed.

It is easy to get overwhelmed with all the things that have to be done and not enough time to do them. The body and mind have more energy but there are only so many active hours in the day. This can cause frustration and confusion.

Choose one area to focus on whenever there is time to accomplish a task. Stick with that one area.

This narrows the inspiration-field to lessen confusion.

My task right now? Time to sleep.

Good night;)

Marilyn

Why Listening is the Best Thing for Others

Saturday, May 4, 2013 - 9:30 PM - Day 42 of Life Coaching Blog

One of the biggest mistakes people make is giving too much advice to others.

9 out of 10 times, most people just want someone to listen to them.
Listening without judgment, listening openly with empathy, listening attentively is the best a person can do for another.

Most people feel validated and supported by a good listener. This brings them inner strength to create solutions to their problems on their own.

In addition, many problems will solve themselves if left alone to the wisdom of nature.

I have devoted my entire career to effective listening. I recommend it highly:))

Warm regards,
Marilyn

Musicians are GREAT listeners!

Friday, May 3, 2013 - 10:15 PM - Day 41 of Life Coaching Blog

"Music is the shorthand of emotion," said Leo Tolstoy. Which helps to explain why playing a musical instrument makes you significantly better at picking up on how other people are really feeling -- the upshot of a study published by the Annals of the New York Academy of Sciences. Researchers discovered that musicians (novices included) have sharper and more sensitive neural tuning than non-musicians, which helps them hear more emotion in the pitch and timbre of human voices. This may translate into superior mind-reading skills -- like knowing how genuine your neighbor is when she chirps hello or whether your crying baby (or partner) is hungry, angry or just has gas."
(From HuffPost)

I guess that's why I've been successful in my job all these years ...

If you or anyone you know is looking for a life-coach, please contact me.

Have a great weekend - TGIF!

Marilyn

How Do You Wake Up?

Thursday, May 2, 2013 - 10:00 PM - Day 40 of Life Coaching Blog

I've been paying attention to something interesting for quite some time now:

How you feel when you wake up in the morning is very telling!

A healthy, balanced person will feel good upon waking. Their mood will be calm and happy, thoughts clear, ready to start the day. Even if the night before was problematic, they will still wake up this way.

If a person wakes up depressed or angry it is a telltale sign there is a deeper problem that needs to be addressed and resolved.

The same is true for our body. We should wake up feeling refreshed and energized.

If we wake up exhausted, as if we didn't sleep, something is off. Maybe we are fighting a cold, maybe we overdid the exercise, or maybe there is a medical issue.
And - the most obvious - if we wake up "half dead";) more sleep is needed!

This may seem obvious to some people, but the important aspect of my sharing this realization is chronic morning fatigue and/or depressed/angry mood will lead to major problems later. Guaranteed.

Prevention is always better that a cure!

Sleep well,
Marilyn

Knowing when NOT to Exercise

Wednesday, May 1, 2013 - 9:00 PM - Day 39 of Life Coaching Blog

I've been dropping my plans and ideas of how often to exercise each week. I hope to exercise at least every other day. However, my energy level is not up to par. I pulled a muscle which is complicating my walk/run. Sometimes you have to skip the exercise and just go home and rest.

I want to encourage you to not feel bad if you don't exercise the way you planned. There is a greater intelligence beyond the mind and its ideas. If we listen to our body it will always tell us what it needs when we are in balance. Trust your inner intelligence. Trust nature.

Namaste

Marilyn